User blog comment:Abriella Laterose/Maid's Quest/@comment-1859920-20130723015340

Hey there! I haven't had time to really check out this fanfiction(and quite frankly, there aren't really any fanfictions that I actually do keep up with) but it looks kinda neat. There was one thing I noticed though, right off that was interesting and also mortifying. As I like to remember and memorize bits, phrases, and poetry from the Redwall books, I noticed that the poem you made in the beginning looks familiar.

In fact, phrases such as, "The wind's icy breath, cries o'er the land of silent death", "'Cross heaving depth and ominous wave", and "Lies a land known to some" are extremely identical to ones from Mariel of Redwall(pages 60 & 96) from Fieldroan the Traveler. Admittedly, they are a bit modified up fit your means.

Now I don't mean to burst your bubble, but it just ain't proper to take phrases of Jacques' poetry and modify it to fit your means( though I admit your poem does look nicely).

My only advice I can give about changing it, is to keep the other lines(which appear that you did make) and try and make up other poetic lines similar to Jacques' but with different words.