User blog comment:SaynaSLuke/The Warriors Begining/@comment-2142396-20141219133124

Wow, that was an exciting story! I admit I was a bit skeptical at first, since book rewrites are outside my comfort zone (I lean toward fiction that keeps to canon), but then I was carried away by the story. The horses needed some getting used to, but finally I liked Dancer and her friendship with Sally.

I love how you drew a connection between Vilu Daskar, Badrang and Verdauga; that gave an impression of a bigger picture behind the story. I love Groddil’s portrayal as a mentor; he always seemed to me a type of the grey character who was forced into war. And I really liked Rupert, even if he wasn’t such a big character. I’ve also got to say that Raven/Erwin is an interesting and strong character, though I wonder why Badrang didn’t recognize her face. Lord Ignasa reminded me of Aslan a lot, I wonder if there was an influence…

In the beginning it seemed that Sally was going to overshadow both Martin and Rose, so I was glad that they developed distinct personalities of their own. The final battle was good, though I expected Deepfin to play bigger role. I like how Badrang died: both Martin and Erwin had their revenge.

As for criticisms… There are typos, but that’s more of a technical point. Besides, I noticed how your writing improved. The beginning was kind of choppy, but later action started to move smoothly and more details appeared.

Overall, you did a great job on such an impressive project as a book rewrite! I’ll pick up the sequel, though I make no promise on when (I’m a slow reader). By the way, I really love your illustrations!

Also, if you’re interested in fan fiction, I’ll be glad if you had a look on my story ‘For Freedom’ and its side story ‘Sharkslayer’. ‘For Freedom’ is my current project and it is being updated, though slowly (I’m a slow writer…)

Again, thank you for sharing your stories with us!